Category Archives: Travel

Funchilde - isms, Laughs, Stories, Travel

Travel Personalities, pt. ii

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The main thing I like about traveling is the people. That said I don’t necessarily like ALL of the people all of the time, but everybody’s got a story and I’m curious enough to want to hear it. The people that cause me to roll my eyes are not suffering personality flaws so much as they possess some unfortunate personal/physical/hygienic issue that I simply cannot overlook. Here are a few of the types of travelers that I try to keep an eye out for (continued from pt. i):

2. The Bump’n Grinders: Simply put these are the people that stand so close to you when you are in line that they can read your passport number through your pants. This is largely cultural in nature. Latin Americans and Spaniards have a lower threshold for personal space. They are very affectionate, touchy-feely, and culturally comfortable with people standing very close, touching them and even jumping/cutting lines. Uh, and I’m a Crazy.Black.Chick. with the emphasis on Crazy and Black, for this sidenote. Studies show that people of different cultures, races and sexes, tend to put more space between themselves when interacting, than when talking to someone of the same race, culture and gender. As an African American Female I like about 17 feet of clear space in all directions around me at all times, my Latin American amigos…not so much. My remedy is to go on the offense. I now try to see how many different people I can touch or jostle at a time. And if you’re cute…no, that wasn’t me that pinched your bum bum.

**Why I’m going to hell: for pinching people’s bum-bums!

So you tell us about some of the people you’ve met on the road!

To Be Continued…

Funchilde - isms, Laughs, Stories, Travel

Travel Personalities, pt. i

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I’m probably going to HELL for this but…

The main thing I like about traveling is the people. That said I don’t necessarily like ALL of the people all of the time, but everybody’s got a story and I’m curious enough to want to hear it. The people that cause me to roll my eyes are not suffering personality flaws so much as they possess some unfortunate personal/physical/hygienic issue that I simply cannot overlook. Here are a few of the types of travelers that I try to keep an eye out for:

1. The Hackasaurus Rex: This is the person that sits next to or near you on a plane/train/bus that has some (probably contagious) unfortunate upper respiratory disease that causes them to hack non-stop from Albany to Zurich. Absent earphones or earplugs you will not get a moment of sleep because of their persistent cough. They have been coughing so long that they no longer bother (much) to cover their mouth, and you can feel their amoeba attacking your white blood cells before the plane hits the runway. This person is usually between 40 and 60 years old and NEVER has any ‘Tussin, Vicks or cough drops.

** Why I’m going to hell: I recently sat next to a Hackasaurus. She looked healthy and bright eyed when I sat down. 20 minutes later I realized my mistake. I offered her the half-eaten roll of cough drops from my daypack. She took ONE. I was like “oh Hell-to-the-naw, you can keep the whole roll” okay I was only thinking that. She takes the roll and says “they work a little, but not for long. I have lung cancer.” Yes, people I know. Bad Funchilde, I hopefully somewhat redeemed myself by sending up prayers and good vibes for her. We did giggle a bit about some things during the trip but I wanted so badly to reach out and touch her arm and just let her know I was there and I heard her and I was grateful for the health she did have. Unfortunately, we were laughing too much for me to inject that sentimental nonsense into the moment. My grandmother is a breast cancer survivor, I lost my ex father in-law (yeah I’m confused too) and my Aunt Gloria to cancer. I promise, next time I see one of those yellow Livestrong bracelets I’m all over it!

To Be Continued….

So, tell us about some of the whacky characters and charming people you’ve met on the road! 

 

 

Pre-trip planning, Semester @ Sea, Travel

Pre-Trip Planning: 100..99..98..things left to do

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*I luv this pic so much*

The countdown begins. 60 days until we set sail for 100 days around the world with semester at sea. While I’m:

1. applying for travel visas to India, China and Brazil
2. pee-ing in a cup to pass drug and health tests
3. figuring out what nasty diseases i should get innoculations for
4. figuring out what to pack
5. trying not to buy this

…go check out www.Solbeam.com, Sol’s back on the road with amazing photos and video. I’m looking forward to traveling with yall again.

Life. Love. Laughs., Semester @ Sea, Travel

The Love (travel) Boat

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600 students
100 days
50 staff
13 ports
10 countries
1 Archbishop
1 large boat

I’m so excited, humbled and busy that I don’t even know how to process the news. I was selected to join the Semester at Sea staff and we set sail January 29, 2007 for 100 days around the world. I’m going to miss my baby brother and future sister-in-law’s wedding, but I’ll just send them a really nice gift. Plus, she just got back from covering a story in South Africa, so I don’t feel so bad.

This year has been magical, both in the memories I’ve created and the misstakes I’ve made, and new ones are literally on the horizon. I wish I could take all of you with me, but I’m sure yall can’t get off work, and you won’t fit in my bag (and I’m notoriously cranky if I have to share a room). I have already had offers from people offering to be my: husband, wife, domestic partner, sherpa and “cabin boy.”  

So, what shall I pack? I’m thinking: 15 pairs of underwear, my camera and some breath mints. That’s as far as I’ve gotten. Take a peek at the itinerary and tell us which places you’d be most excited about.

Eye Holes (books/film), Photos, Travel

Bell-bottom Crossing

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Photo by febpanda.

If anyone is wondering what my hair looks like these days, this sign is a fairly accurate representation. Actually, this chick’s whole vibe is a pretty good likeness of me in general. I put the FUN in FUNK yall! This sign is posted outside the Royal Palace in Bangkok, I’m not sure why bell bottoms are necessary, but I can’t wait to get to Bangkok to wear some. As a matter of fact, I am going to stand in front of this sign dressed just like this woman.

I still can’t divulge the Big News, because I haven’t communicated with all of my clients yet. BUT I can tell you that the countdown to my next vagabond adventure is 14 weeks away. Time to get the shots, update the passport/visas and dust off the camera. As usual, I have about 6 months of “to do’s” that I have to complete in 3.5 months so send me some good vibes yall. The only thing more fun than planning and prepping is actually going, so I’m feeling that pre-travel high. It doesn’t help that I’m going through travel anthologies at an alarming pace. I just finished The Risks of Sunbathing Topless and Best American Travel Writing 2006. If you have any other suggestions to feed the habit, holla in the comments!

Life. Love. Laughs., Quotes, Travel

Hampton, Virginia: Welcome Back

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[1] Yes, life DOES take VISA!
Diagnostic to determine that Shorty Rock (my car) cannot be fixed? $78
Installing alarms on The Duplex due to weekend break-in? $700
Still feeling like the luckiest chic on the planet? priceless.

[2] Jorge left Andrea and I in Cuernavaca one Jack Daniels drenched morning at 4am to head on to Acapulco with a bunch of random new-found friends. I didn’t cry. Mostly because he was tipsy and kept naming the 3 frogs on my t-shirt after the three of us in a hiccup-riddled state of inebriation. Andrea and I caught a bus back to El DF (Mexico City) where we had to split up and head to different bus terminals to get to our respective destinations (Ecuador for her, Guanajuato for me). We both cried as we hailed separate cabs at the station, clutching hands and starting sentences we couldn’t finish. Finally she just got in her cab and that was it. I’ve since heard from both of them and they are well. No longer the stars of this here blog and the center of my international social life, but no less missed.

[3] I was startled to find that I was both excited to get home to the states and blue to be leaving the life I’d been living the last 3 months. Even after being back for a month (I got back in early June) I am still equally excited about being home and anxious to get back to Latin America. Though I’m enjoying focusing on some of my non-travel related goals, I am also plotting my return to Mexico (October depending on the free-lance contract situation). I am also realizing that though I dubbed this my “one year off”, that I’m falling in lurve with the lifestyle itself and one year won’t be nearly enough.

[4] Dream Big. If there is something you dream of doing, something so crazy you don’t even say it out loud but you often think “If I could do X….” then get started, life waits for no (wo)man and you deserve your shot at bliss as much as anyone. Good luck, God Speed and Stay Tuned. It really wouldn’t have been the same without you.

“I’d rather die on my feet than live a lifetime on my knees.”
– Emiliano Zapata

Culture, Eye Holes (books/film), Laughs, Mexico, People, Travel

Cuernavaca: The Good, The Bad & The Ugly

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I was deathly ill for the trip to Cuernavaca, so I don’t remember much but here’s the run down.

The Good: Because I was quarantined for three days, I had ample time to finish reading The Chronicles of Narnia (774 pages!), 100 Years of Solitude, and The Memory of Running (a new personal favorite).

The Bad: I had such a bad fever that I had to put on every item of clothing I had brought with me when I went to bed. I haven’t had a fever like that since 1977. It was that bad. A Canadian nurse that we ran into said there was some type of virus going around.

The Ugly: I sweated through ALL of my clothes in two days and had to stumble around in my exhausted stupor to find a llavanderia (laundry) to have all my clothes washed when my fever broke (3 days later).

When I was finally fit to move among the living, I caught up with Andrea and Jorge at the local spot on the Zocalo only to find that I shouldn’t drink because of the virus. So I watched everyone else drink the (literal) buckets of beer served at the expat hangout. Jorge and Andrea were with 5 others that I didn’t know but was quickly introduced to as the “third amigo” I feel bad saying this but this bar was my least favorite place we had ever been to and I realized it was because it was PACKED with Americans! I mean there were even a dozen African Americans in this place, it was like little Chicago up in there. Fortunately Andrea got us the hook up (yet again) and this dude gave us wrist bands for free drinks before midnight at the club down the street if we made it there by 10:30.

The Good: Andrea’s hook up got us free drinks and we didn’t have to stand in the line outside!

The Bad: Jorge’s idea to spring for the VIP lounge and a bottle of Jack Black at a club whose tagline is: “The Sunny Place for Shady People.” There was no way anything good was going to come of this.

The Ugly: Getting dry-humped and kissed by a VIP interloper (Edgar, pictured above), who I then determined to be rather cute and fairly intelligent so I quickly foisted him off onto Andrea. They made a connection and hung out for the next 3 days until it came time to say tearful goodbyes and she cursed the city of Cuernavaca and its men.

*Bonus: What the hell kind of dance is that Jorge? 

 

Life. Love. Laughs., Mexico, Travel

Oaxaca Mexico: We’re Still Talking About This?

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Okay, I know I’m like the worst blogger ever. I despise it when my favorite bloggers go on hiatus and my continuous *click*refresh* yields nothing new. BUT I’ve been on the move.

Oaxaca was so much fun that I have been dragging this story out for like 3 weeks now I think. Just to put us all out of our misery:

We danced, danced and danced some more (well, Paul did anyway)
We bought drinks until our pockets held only lint
We stayed out until it was so late that we debated going to breakfast
We drank the prettiest cappucino ever made
I talked literature, music and travel with The Crush under the stars
The impossible curls, smile and baby brown eyes of The Crush
We watched bootleg movies
Visited The Crush at work
We drank the best.hot.chocolate.ever on a beautiful rainy evening
We watched locals dance in the zocalo at midnight
We sang more karaoke
We took Salsa lessons ($5.50US for 1.5hrs-video here of Andrea)
Received roses (no, these are not from the crush)
Danced with The Crush and The Crew
Drank the worm
Fell in lurve with the Moon
Laughed, laughed and laughed some more
Caught a cold

And…we left for Cuernavaca, holding out hope that The Crush could join us, but college boys gotta work hard for the money.

People, Photos, Travel

Oaxaca Mexico: I have found my people…pt. vi-x

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Wow. Who knew there were like dozens of brown folks all over Mexico? We ran into this good looking group of Morehouse and Spelman students Wednesday night while having dinner and drinks on the Zocalo (there are more of them in the city). What a great group of students from two of the best colleges in the US. They are all staying with Mexican families and taking classes at the local University. The prospect of early morning classes did not stop them from inviting us out to party. Debauchery ensued.

Efosa (20, GA) John (20, NC); Jessica (19, MD); Eric (20, AL) and Robert (21, GA).

Wednesday: To be continued… 

 

Culture, Mexico, Photos, Pie Hole (Food)

Oaxaca Mexico: Still Cooking (in & out of the kitchen)

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So in a fit of intelligence, I checked my schedule and realized I didn’t actually have to work until Thursday. I took the advice of Travis (commenter extraordinaire!) and finagled my way into a cooking class ($70US for one-on-one, hands on style class). So that is what I did Wednesday morning. Despite Tuesday night’s activities, I was clear-eyed enough to make it to Casa Crespo at 10am (what is up with these morning cooking classes?). Carlos was my host and the owner of this small B&B/cooking school. He is so multi-talented that I began to feel like a poorly educated underachiever with no focus and no goals. Then he started pouring the beer and that feeling went away. Seriously though, dude is an accomplished artist, tourism geek, world traveler, B&B owner and chef (and some other stuff I’m forgetting)! It was just the two of us and we had a ball. We walked (seemingly uphill both ways) to the local market where he took me to all of the stalls and talked about various veggies, techniques and peppers. The colors were vibrant and got me excited about the day’s class and meal. Well, this didn’t pique my appetite, but it sure caught my eye.

Oh wait. I totally got hit on by my cab driver. It was so funny that I couldn’t even be offended. These guys have balls (pardon the pun). We are chatting (in spanish) and he starts asking about my boyfriend/kid/housing situation and I ask him about his girlfriend/kid/housing situation. He has a girlfriend and loves the regular sex but wishes there were more of it! We were both just laughing and laughing at this, I told him that maybe she was tired and he said that maybe he needed a back-up and looked pointedly at me. I told him that I was old enough to be his older sister and that I was taking a break from romance. He told me to give him a call when my break was over. I had tears streaming down my face yall. It was one of those times where you only spend 5 minutes with somebody but you make a totally humor-filled, in-the-moment connection that you both recognize as special and fleeting. After he pulled away from the curb I wanted to shout: “well done young man, well done!” but I figured I was already running low on “cool points” for the day.

Now, lest ye loyal readers who don’t know me think I’m some man magnet, let me assure you that I am not. Well, not really. I haven’t posted any pics of me mainly because I’m “growing my hair out” into its natural state and this requires that I wear a bandana/headscarf 24 hours a day and I just can’t embarass my momma like that and have pics of me in a bandana all over Mexico, floating around the web. I WILL say though (and any of my exes who are reading this I need you to keep your lips zipped)…that I have a certain allure…my chubby charm as I call it, seems to attract both men and women and believe me, I am the least “saxxy” person I know in terms of flirtation/dressing provocatively, yada yada yada. What I DO have is a nice rack (well, I do) and a great sense of humor, a contagious smile and an air of unattainability that men seem to want to investigate. Either that or I give off some pheromonal scent that attracts the male beast in the 15-21 and 45-65 age groups. I don’t know what it is, and I’m not all that interested in finding out. But if you are a female in need of an ego boost or international romance, you need look no further than the men of Mexico.

Okay, back to the cooking class: Tortilla Soup (we fried up our own tortillas strips!), Salsa Verde (Green Salsa), Chicken Enchiladas, Salsa Roja (Red Salsa), Fresh Guacamole, Tortillas Con Carne (pork) and Flan (from scratch!). We drank so much beer and giggled so much that we were barely able to eat all that we cooked. I said barely. And doesn’t this make you question your optimist/pessimist philosophy? Me in my apron and favorite Pink Polo shirt. I recommend a visit to Carlos at Casa Crespo when you get here and try to get cabbie #OX45787. Whether you get “lucky” or not, he’ll probably make your day.

Wednesday: To be continued….